Self Harming

What is Self Harming ?
Self harming is a way of expressing distressing feelings and emotions. Many people think that self harming is a way of seeking attention but it isn't. Individuals self harm as they see it as a release. By self harming they see the distressing feelings and emotions being released. Many people on the outside see self harming as cutting and scratching their skin. However, self harming can include; taking an overdose, developing an eating disorder, becoming addicted to something such as alcohol or someone not looking after their own emotional and physical needs.

Why do people Self Harm?
People who self harm are likely to have gone through a very upsetting, traumatic or distressing time. Often, many people who are bullied turn to self harming. Those people who have been bullied have experienced a very traumatic time and so they see self harming as a release. An experience like this can lower your self esteem and make you believe that it is your fault and it is something that you are doing that is making the bullying happen. When you self harm your body creates a loss of feeling around the pain and so eases the emotional hurt that you feel.

Is Self Harming an attempt to commit suicide?
When people self harm they aren't doing it because they want to commit suicide, but they are doing it to survive. Although there is a suggested relationship between suicide and self harming, people believe that when they self harm pain is released. Self harming is not an attempt to commit suicide but an attempt to feel some kind of comfort and loss of feeling over the pain.

What can you do to stop self harming?
The most important thing to remember is that there are ways to stop self harming.
1. Try and keep a diary on a daily basis. Write in it when you self harm, why you felt the need to do it and how you felt. Eventually over a period of time you should be able to see a pattern of when you self harm and what 'triggers' it. In other words what makes you want to self harm? What do you feel before and after.
2. Try to talk to someone supportive about how you feel. Even though you may feel that you are alone there are lots of people out there that can understand and help to build your self esteem and confidence.
3. Work on building up your self esteem. Remember you are not to blame for how you feel and it is not your fault. Make a list of your feelings and then write down positive things about yourself. If you can't think of any then ask a friend or a relative to write down what they like about you. Keep these lists somewhere that they can be seen. Everyday try to reflect on them and keep telling yourself the things that people like about you and what you are good at.

Finally, remember that it isn't your fault and there is help out there for you! If you would like more advice then please click on the 'Ask A Question' link.